Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
I was sitting on the floor of CVS chugging white grape juice until someone asked me to leave.
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
The cops said we could pay $250 or spend the night in jail and get 2 free meals. I might pee in mail-boxes more often
He counted every piece of macaroni in the box and then faceplanted into the bowl
A blow job from a tiger shark would still entail less risk to your genitals than having sex with her.
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
My brother didnt wanna sleep with her because she was my friend. Did I miss the memo where we're not supposed to be fucking each others friends? Oh well too late.
On a Thurs night I found myself drunk in a limo w 9 dudes on my way to a strip club. Once there I was handed $100 in ones and told "spend it." I need a husband. Or Jesus.
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
Somewhere on my work laptop I have a map visualizing all the area codes that Ludacris has ho's
I hope that wasn't done on billed time
I can guarantee that it was
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
Randomize
