i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
Just found a wrench in the washing machine. Sooo not doing your laundry anymore.
My body is a temple...that happens to be able to get me free Patron shots at the bar
It was over as soon as he asked if he could name my vagina pancake.
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
I sang him a lovely rendition of 'So Long and Thanks For All the Fish", but replaced fish with dick.
He came over last night and as soon as we started having sex Siri announced "you've arrived at your destination." I think it was some kinda sign
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
My mom just busted me rolling a blunt on her bathroom counter. ...all she said was fuck it it's Christmas
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
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