So you used a whole package of smoked meat last night. Didn't eat it, just took it out and put it all over the fridge.
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
Just remembered I said your cat looked delicious last night.
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
I was covered in mud from my knees down, I smelt like the inside of a port-a-potty and only had mascara on one eye. . . so you know your usual Sunday brunch.
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
It'd be good to change things up a bit, right now the only public service I'm doing from my apt is hanging out in my underwear with the lights on.
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
Randomize
