I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
at last call she tried to get the bartender to fill her flask. when he refused, i had to stop her from trying to pour the rest of her beer in there.
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
Nothing says 'good morning' like waking up only to realize this chick was watching you sleep. She's crazy
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
Fuck me this girl I went home with has a cover on her remote control so there is no spills to ruin it. Imagine how many condoms she's going to make me wear
I can't take my grandparents out somewhere where I've fucked half the staff.
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
My idiot ex texted me on Valentine's day to tell me I was right, he did need a therapist.
I just ordered a five person drink for myself.... Right about now you should start saving me from myself....
I am watching the most amazing drunk person ever. Literally such a trooper that you can put anything in front of him he'll drink it. His latest reason for taking another shot was: well whatever. I'm never gonna get married anyway.
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
You went on the date? His pickup line was I swear I'm not a serial killer and you went on the date???
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