she was mega hot - except for the poop under her fingernails
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
Its the anniversary of our epic NBA All-star game weekend. The night the two of us cashed a 30-pack while watching the dunk contest
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
That's how you know it was a good night if two months later you finally realized your skirt never made it home and you found out where it was.
I had to sit there with his three fat aunts talking about a bunch of 50 Shades knockoff books.
I felt like a taxi, but my meter was running up minutes he would be eating me out that night.
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
Ever been to a strip club with one stripper? I have. And she sucked.
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize
