She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
Just warning you now f you do not get intoxicated with me in front of the family on thanksgiving we are not related.
I put you to bed and you would not go unless I let you sleep with the vodka
Planning a foam party. Swimsuits are mandatory, and please no granny suits. If you wear a granny suit I will stick you in the corner and put a cone hat on your head.
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
Well my unnaturally hairy chest finally came in handy. It took at least an hour to shave the american flag into my chest but I definitely went America all over that party
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
I threw your vagina at him like a grenade. And sweet Jesus he caught it like a champ
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
There is no way entering a gas station bathroom memorializing an alien abduction in rural New Hampshire is a good idea.
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
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