he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
We got baked and watched the cheetah girls on Netflix
You need to not admit that.
I woke up to a shot of jager next to my face. I felt bad for it so i drank it
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
I think his roommates are using word magnets to tell me that they can hear us. His fridge currently says, "Chris ate out naughty girl."
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
Let's FaceTime each other while we shotgun beers
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
My tinder date had to be home by 8:30 cause she's on house arrest.
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
Randomize
