Every time we have sex I can't stop thinking about Jesus
my head looks like a cockatoo
mine looks like a lions mane...looks like the entire zoo is going to prom
hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
I'm fighting fire with fire. When my parents interrogate me about what I was doing last night, I tell them the truth. Every disgusting, awkward detail. I'm 23 now and they need to get used to it.
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
in case you were wondering, even a BJ under a blanket on the back of a bus only lifts a 14-hour bus ride to borderline tolerable.
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
He had a drawn-on fu manchu and now my vagina has one too.
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
Im too stoned for my mom to be picking up hitch hikers. Help.
Randomize
