Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
I twisted my ankle last night doing a super high five with 3 inch heels on.
Playing drinking games to Nancy Grace totally counts as "keeping up with current events.."
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
It's alright she couldn't hear you. Her legs were over her ears
Look dude, you cant keep blaming everything on the new years party. Its february...
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
Sat down on an escalator. That hungover.
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
It's like Jesus got stoned and this would be the sandwiches he'd make
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
Randomize
