Looks like an M-80 went off in a lb. of pastrami
I swear to god he was trying to crawl under my door last night muttering "I'm Alex Mac! I'm Alex Mac!"
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
Just got a event reminder on my phone to never party with you again.
In the future let's not drunk dive in the fountain in front of the hotel bar.
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
My previously white toilet seat is now hot pink. I'm not sure why or how but I know it's your fault.
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
Randomize