Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
Passed out on a playground for a while before trying to break into the elementary school. Erica thought her captain tasted like cat food, so she poured her bottle into her cat's dish and proceeded to eat it like cereal.
You win. Erica always eats cat food.
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
I'm at a bar. It's body paint Wednesday. All of the waitresses are topless. Help me
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
Got super judged by this lady at the Rolling Stones concert last night. Bitch don't look so salty at my dad and I splitting two joints, an edible, and two margaritas. It's the stones.
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
Life is my bitch right now. The bouncers tried to carry me out of the club, but everyone thought I was crowd surfing so everyone carried me BACK IN. Winning as fuck.
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
Twas still the Saturday before Christmas \nAnd it’s still fucking snowing\nAnd Steve wished he slowed down \nOn all the fucking drinking
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