I just saw the Donald Trump of homeless quys walking down the street. He had three shopping carts and a bike.
You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
probably shouldnt have written that paper while wasted, its starts with once upon a time
i tried to stop you but you kept shouting "two birds with one stone!"
i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
this will be a night to untag.
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
Truth be told I was googling "why is my left calf bigger than my right calf", porn would've been a better excuse for a virus.
Santa brought me a 1.75 of wine, and a liter of patron. I probably won't remember Christmas, so don't ask me how it was tomorrow.
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
He carried you out but the best part is you kept saying "can't I keep dancing" as you were gushing blood
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
I apparently asked the cab driver to show us his dick and then he showed me a picture of his girlfriend
Nothing will ever be as awkward as looking my mother in the eye and talking to her while I have a dick inside me. Time for a lock on my door.
Randomize
