I changed my tire completely alone.. I could totally win survivor
Its my greatest physical accomplishment
What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
we made a giant pot of alcholic jello. i filled a gallon bag and brought it to dorms. desk guy gave me weird looks, he doesnt realize this is how i will pass all of my room searches
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
this stripper weighs a pound. I feel like I should tip her in food.
I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff
I need to stop having one night stands with guys in my building so I can have someone to borrow milk from without it being awkward
She set an alarm on my phone for her birthday. Place: Her bed.
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
I feel like I may be the only person who can say they crutched their walk of shame. past the secret service.
i spent most of my hangover doing the math to figure out the last of the alcohol would be metabolized from my system.
thank you pre-med degree.
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
Randomize