Have you ever seen a 300 pound pregnant lady's boob fall out of her shirt cuz she's not wearing a bra? I have.
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
I just learned you can mail a coconut. I'll be over in 3 days with the rum.
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
Step 1: chug a red bull vodka with no ice Step 2: chase that with a shot of wild turkey Step 3: chase that with a shot of tequila
Step 4: your drunk
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
I have this theory that your highest awareness of how drunk you are is while you're sitting on a toilet
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
my friends roomated asked me this morning if we went to mcdonalds last night and i had no idea...that is until i checked my purse and found half a mcdouble in it...
Randomize
