Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
Dude, we're at Einstein's Bagels and the dude next to us is spreading cannabutter on his bagel.
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
Either I spilled whiskey on my boobs last night or they are fermenting. Not concerned in the slightest
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
Also, I'm kinda hungover this morning and I need to wire money to my lawyer. So this is what adulthood feels like
Well, you were never considered a shining example of sobriety anyway
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
I may or may not be drunker than time right now.
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
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