well I can't set my house on fire every night
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
there are certain things about getting into a cab to go home at 630 am that make me feel like a prostitute.
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
My dad is drinking wine out of a measuring cup. This explains so much.
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
being single and having a boyfriend 300 miles away is eerily similar. never skipped a beat eating hot wings in my bed with no pants or masturbating every day.
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
Who the fuck stole my fridge again
If Dr Phil has taught me anything about myself, it’s that I can seriously relate to those women who fake their pregnancies.
You smoked too much and passed out, didn't you?
You know me so well.
Randomize
