Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
just wanted to thank u for shitting in my dads bidet last night. i had to manually scoop ur shit out of it. btw ur dumped.
I feel like a great embryo-shaped weight has been lifted off my shoulders.
figured you should hear this from me. Your refrigerator door is way broken. I opened it last night when i was drunk and tried to climb the shelves. i got to the one with the mustard.
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
so...the lady doing my pedi totally noticed the human bite marks on my calf. Who says marriage ends your sex life? Love u!
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
Randomize
