problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
Don't judge me. If you're going to fall off a bed you might as well do it gracefully into a bag full of beer.
I guess I just laid down next to him with the entire pot of mac n cheese and started giving him a handie with one hand and eating with the other
I may have just unintentionally roofied a man in a wheelchair
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
my dad is now demonstrating how to start a fire with a tampon. happy fucking new year!
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
Apparently it's illegal to hit pedestrians with coke cans... But the cop complimented my arm. That's a win in my book.
I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
My mom just looked at me and said; "You've been pretty bitchy lately do you need some dick?" WTF has happened to me?
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize
