Flying into Chicago for a few days, getting re-deployed in September, we should probably fuck
Kristina got the same text from you just now, she's sitting next to me, how many people did you send this to?
How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
I had ketchup on my elbow and a random girl goes "I got it" and licked it off, only on game day
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
The bathroom smells like ribs. What did you do?
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
You fell asleep on the toilet and he was like uh should I take her off?
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
You know you have an interesting job when you go to work and have to Google search "How to get poop out of a dryer".
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
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