so i woke up this morning thinking _____ was in bed with me. . .but it was only a half eaten sonic burger
he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
I will not remember tonight for the most part. This text will be evidence. You can and probably will use this against me.
I finally fell asleep and like an hour later he wakes me up and says "I've always to be woken up w a blowjob." Um, that's not how it works asshole.
Hey, don't think you remember me but we met last night. I'm conducting a survey this morning its only one question: Have you seen Rob since 1am?
I had 17 beers 2 days ago. I'm not dad material yet
If making out with three guys at once at a Kesha concert while simultaneously smearing glitter all over yourself doesn't convince her you're gay, nothing will
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
He stole me a cantaloupe and we drunkenly broke into a park and ate it on a bench with my pocket knife. I think i need to marry him
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