i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
So..he puked on my dress and I had to walk back to the dorms in his little sisters Scooby Doo pajamas.
I don't know you.
Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
I told my ex i loved him and then he sent me a picture of this girl laying on his bed.
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
New years is officially the only time its okay to drunk dial your parents.
The google font looked peculiar last night, but then up close I realized it was just dry vomit.
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
If you have a glass table... Put it up. I don't wanna hurt myself again, I just got my stitches out...
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
Because if not I was going to quote Ryan Lochte as punishment
Thank god I got my shit together
We celebrated our relationship by shotgunning beers on his lawn in our underwear. I may have to marry this man...
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
So just spent 30 minutes of my life talking to my cousins friend who told me she buys cocaine from a pizza place by asking for extra Parmesan
Randomize
