and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
Jesus can read your poker face... He is not pleased
Michael Bay is the white Tyler Perry.
Just found a hole in my wall with your left shoe in it.
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
I'm amazed your boyfriend is still with you, how do you manage to pee on him while he is holding you in his lap?
You need Xanax blowdarts
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
I missed you last night. I'm sure he will never forget the night i sang my heart will go on into his penis like a microphone
OHMYGOD YOU REALLY THINK I'D BE ON OPRAH?!
Randomize
