ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
We were sexting and then the radio announced robert pattinson would be playing kurt cobain in a movie and it totally killed the mood
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
He's spent his last 3 years working at Urban Outfitters. No, I'm not sad I missed out on a life of mustaches, the dollar menu and shitty scarves.
I can feel the alcohol in my calves
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
Nothing like being buzzed at 10:20am off wine shots in Amish country
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
TYLER OWES ME SO MUCH
I LET A CREEPY MAN I DONT KNOW SUCK ON MY NIPPLES
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
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