i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
I just threw up and a whole piece of spaghetti came out of my nose. I don't even remember eating spaghetti.
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
Penises. Everywhere.
You're. Welcome.
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
I literally just wiped coffee off of the corner of my mouth with my boob because my hands were full. Thought youd be proud. Good morning!
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
L'Shannah Tovah!
Whats that? My new stripper name?
He's tiny, but ripped. Like a stacked hobbit. He's going to pull our sexy, crime-fighting rickshaw.
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
You threw a beachball full of vodka at me and yelled I CHOOSE YOU then ran
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