just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
Guys who wear capris make me want to kill endangered species.
Its a long story, but I have superglue on my tongue
Bagel with cream cheese. It's blowing my fucking mind.
How high are you right now..
I MICROWAVED IT. SIGNIFICANT IMPROVEMENT.
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
You got kicked out of the strip club for spilling a tall boy on the stage and when the bouncers came to take you out you told them that they should probably go clean up your pee in the back corner cause they didn't seem to notice that
Sorry for trying to give you my dresser last night. Are any of the drawers still in your car?
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
He acted like he was sleep fucking because I woke up to him screwing me in the middle of the night and he had is eyes closed and was mumbling things the whole time and wouldn't respond to me.
Is that even possible?
I called him by the wrong name to test him and he instantly stopped, rolled over and acted like he was still sleeping...I think he might break up with me tomorrow.
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
Yeah then she waddled like a duck in silence sat down and ate the entire paper towel roll.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
Once you jizz in someones hat, you cant take it back.
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
Randomize
