Did I tell you he has dinosaur sheets?
Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
you know how i said i wouldn't send that pic message of your lofted bed falling from you fucking a fat chick? that was after i sent it to your mom
Just joined the godiva rewards club. Who's the fat friend now.
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
They're sharing a mixed drink at a bar with straws...its like a disney movie with booze
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
there's a girl in the coffee shop just eating a pint of ben & jerry's
SMART GIRL
I puked on myself in front of a customer. all. over. myself. thanks Saturday nights
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
Why is there a chicken nugget nailed to my front door?
nothing like smoking out of your roommate's bong with your mom to celebrate the rising of christ
he is risen halelujah
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
Okay first of all fuck you and everything you stand for because Taco Bell is amazing.
Randomize