Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
Saw a pregnant woman get a lap dance last night. I love the south.
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
He came on my chest. Sat back and said "hey it sorta looks like lake michigan!" kill me now...
I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault.
Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush.
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
I still owe him the card with all the sperm paper cutouts falling out like glitter saying " sorry you can't hold your load. Better luck next time "
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
You have no idea I looked like the porno version of Laura Ingalls Wilder
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
If you think eating a bowl of leftover stuffing and drinking champagne from the bottle in dirty sweats at 9am is sexy... Then yeah, I'm your girl.
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
This is why I should’ve just stuck with blow jobs. I’m good at blow jobs. Blow jobs never fail me.
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
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