She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
can "i'm close!" be our safe word(s)?
oh geez, wrong person.
just woke up. wallet empty. bottle empty. tattoo in pen on my arm. smell like bad sex. woke up alone. and wall-e is playing on my computer. need answers.
just caught my little brother jacking off the family pet
My wife googled 'purchase vibrator.' Not sure if I should be excited or offended.
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
Dude I asked him to get me beef jerky at 4 am and he actually walked to CVS to get it. CVS closes at 12 but it was the perfect opp to dip out
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
You're a disaster
Wanna date?
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
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