..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
apparently i tried to put my coat in the microwave.
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine
I'm going to tattoo a maze on my back for the next fucker that tries to blow early ....
He's the second guy this morning whose job is jeopardized because of my vagina.
I come bearing gifts of whiskey and vagina
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
All I ever do is give guys anxiety problems and flaccid penises.
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
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