But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
so I woke up this morning and on their fridge, the first item on the shopping list was my virginity.
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
And I feel bad.
Because we're having a serious discussion about our sex life and you're playing minecraft?
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
I was giving this guy head and he stopped me to look me in the eyes and say "you have a gift"
She keeps asking if I've seen him... For the last time YES... IN MY BED LAST FRIDAY NIGHT AND THEN AGAIN SATURDAY MORNING
I just want to have beer shits in my own bathroom. Is that too much to ask for?
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
How many times have you told me to call 911 this week?
Lol twice
It's not christmas until we're acting sober in front of grandma
Randomize
