Im at strip club and am horny
I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
the dude from the bar called to tell his mom about me immediately after we finished PLEASE COME GET ME
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
Lights are FLASHING. This just got REAL. CAPTALIZATION.
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
Sometimes you have a life bucket list item checked off like 4 tits in your face simultaneously and getting to bang them both. I'm sorry I bailed on skiing but not really. Coming over with a boombox playing 'heat of the moment' as soon as I can hail a cab cause I'm too drunk to drive still...
He's writing a strongly worded email to Trojan right now
I TOLD YOU THE BARESKIN CONDOMS WEREN'T AS RELIABLE.
He woke up & asked where his pants were then asked where he was then asked who I was. Been married 20 yrs. He was drunkest ever.
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
Do you ever look back on your life and think - man I should have never had sex with that guy
Randomize
