he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
Judging by the amount of alcohol multiplied by the amount of her exes here, tonight will be ending in tears.
I would totes be making out with random people in the name of america if I was at the white house right now
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
Just met another girl you fucked but this time in seattle. Your cock gets almost as much mileage as jet blue. Anaheim and seattle both say hi, figured you don't remember their names.
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
I just woke up to three dick pics. Apparently in my blacked out state. I was asking for them as the new valentines day card.
This dude has my number from April last year. Drunk me left sober me a puzzle. No confirmation of pants off business
I have been referring to it as "thanks for getting out of me day" all week. Do you think they will still take me to brunch tomorrow?
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
I just hip-checked Santa and stole his cab.
I would not recommend douching while drunk.
My ovaries melted while we were talking. I almost told him I would suck his soul out through his dick
That would be a memorable parent teacher conference for sure
Randomize
