i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
I'm sitting here watching a kid lick a basketball- where have i gone wrong in life?
Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
Operation Purity has been aborted
Please tell me what happened last night... specifically who told me it was a good idea to pee in my shoe.
I stayed at the bar and helped clean up cause I was told I'd get free shots. Didn't happen.
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
Ps this homeless dude just came in hotel bar w a sword sticking out his jumpsuit trying to buy a drink w a 3rd party check
I moved out... There's nothing left but his childhood trophies...
You should make him a new one, you know like "you suck at relationships but thanks for trying participation award"
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
He kept saying I needed to go to the hospital and it just made me want to call him a pussy so I went to bed
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
Do you ever go take a shit and end up sitting on the toilet for like 45 minutes wondering what the fuck you're doing with your life?
Everyday my friend, everyday.
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
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