ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
Santa Clause just drove by me on a fire truck. Epic night begins.
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
I was afraid that she would smell her boyfriend's penis on my breath while we were talking.
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
You would be my first round pick for a drinking team
A horseman, i repeat, a man on a horse downtown just told me i was gorgeous and my friends were not. Not drunk enough.
I'm gonna buy my dress an hour before wedding. You know, just to make sure it's gonna really happen.
T'would be a shame to waste that open bar though. They shouldn't do that to us. We've been having to pretend we're happy for two people who got engaged a week after they met.
He threw up on my head while I was blowing him, and then I started barfing, and the kitchen floor was a mess. Believe me, he will never, ever live this down.
I can't believe I'm coordinating a threesome at work. My productivity is at an all time low.
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
Randomize
