And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
Mike is offhisass drunk and just sat down next to my sister and said "If you gained 30 pounds and stopped reading poetry, I would be attracted to you. Now, your little sister, attractive, even though she's basically the same person as you- she just pulls it off better because she's 15."
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
I swear that when I have my own bathroom, I'm gonna lock myself in there and masterbate for at least 3 days in sheer appreciation of it.
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
Lets be real here, you loved it when I was on top. With and without the machete.
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
This is the Santa Claus of hangovers. It just keeps giving.
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
Randomize
