so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
Ever have the mailman look at you like youre a chronic masterbator. I have.
my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
I will never get the visual of you crying while chewing christmas lights out of my head
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
I have to talk to myself and be all "you are NOT horny tonight"
One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers.
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
I will pay you in sex, beer and popcorn if you will come fold my clothes for me.
Add free use of your panini press and its a deal.
Deal.
I just got baptized.
Drunkenly skinny dipping in a indoor hotel pool is not okay and does not count as a baptism.
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