when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
my phone calendar just alerted me that it's "weed time" in 15 minutes. do not remember setting that alert last night...
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
I know your texting costs money, but I'll pay for it if you consider this. Oversized frozen jello shots. I'll buy everything needed if you approve. Let me know
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
Bro, she said my penis was the best thing to happen to her mouth since teeth.
I decided to let him keep the rest of my good weed as an "I'm sorry for being a drunk ass ho" consolation prize.
I'm home now if you wanna come over.
Sloane just tried to lick my eyeball. I'm going to regain my composure then I'll be there.
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
Randomize
