He looks like Jesus, if Jesus had let himself go.
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
lets start a swedish sibling band together
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
she's just sitting here eating cilantro out of my herb garden and watching some show about ducks on tv and laughing, what the fuck did you give her?
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
Like sorry you chose to have an attractive girlfriend dude
How did you not realize the handbrakes were stuck?
I thought I was just out of shape.
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
I just dumped the bloody coke bill into the tip jar while getting my hangover coffee. I'm literally going to hell.
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
Randomize
