last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
The stripper on stage Is eating a mozzarella stick while on the pole....that's a new level of I don't give a fuck
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
She has a boyfriend. But if he's a decent human being he understands blowjobs don't count as cheating with her. Keeping those miracles to himself is a crime against humanity.
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
I. Did. In fact. Sprain. My liver. This. Weekend.
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
I don't know when he had the time to do it but he dug a hole in our basement like the shawshank redemption
So... Sorry we took your wife to the strip club last night... And sorry we bought her that lap dance... I think you're getting closer to your dream of a threesome, though.
Bold words for someone NOT on a unicycle
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