If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
They pulled him over whille he had a fish tank full of beer in his front seat. He told them it coudn't count as an open container cause the top was on it.
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
rethinking that breast reduction surgery... i'm tired of drunkenly explaining the scars to guys who don't really give a shit
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
I'm sweating so much right now i look like Whitney Houston
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
I made the jerking off hand motion to my mother by accident this morning. It was awkward for everyone involved.
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
He rubbed aloe on my sunburn while I blew him... could he be anymore perfect?
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
Yes I went home with her last night. I woke up this morning and ran into my boss on the way to the bathroom. Monday is going to suck at work.
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
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