If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
Just got off the phone with poison control. They're more concerned about our alcohol intake than that the beer bong was last cleaned with pine sol.
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
Currently microwaving whipped cream to make white Russians and hotboxing the kitchen while this random kid is dancing in the corner.
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
Just had a VERY VIVID visualization of wrapping a pizza around my cock and fucking its brains out. Soooooo less weed more dates?
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
You are a super loving wife. But did you, at any point since Thanksgiving, slip me half your bottle of stool softeners?
When breakfast is a rum &coke at the office Christmas party you know it's gonna be a good day
I didn't realize how hungover I was until I fell asleep in my math lecture, and woke up I'm my history class. How is got there still remains a mystery...
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
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