Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
Do you have any idea how horrifying it is to hear your sister and her husband fucking then immediately go down stairs only to hear your parents fucking....... I wish I was Hellen Keller right now.
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
I'm naked, I'm drunk, and I'm all up on social media right now
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
There's a girl passed out on the sidewalk at the parade. Its not even 10am. She gave candy to children saying it was ketchup. Still think I have a problem?
I woke up next to a box of cheese bread it was super romantic
Ooooh no. Jesus take the wheel, or Moses. SOMEBODY TAKE THE WHEEL
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
Nothing wrong with a little cat scratch fever. You have toys?
A few, plus a dildo molded from a porn star that I've always been too intimidated of to actually use, but it's the apocalypse, and momma didn't raise no quitter.
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