Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
I just walked through a room full of deaf people and farted i love deaf people
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
So I had a Liz Lemon moment today....went to Chipotle to get my "cheer me up" burrito bowl for the 4th time this week and the chipotle guy sighed and said always the same huh?
She forced me to throw up so it would "rejuvenate" me. It worked and then we took six more shots and did a keg stand. You know what I call that? Friendship.
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
organizing the empties. That sober.
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
DUDE FUCK CALL ME SHE HAS GRANDKIDS
I pour the whiskey from now on
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
Randomize
