Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
He told me he wanted to break up so he could get "closer to God."
Does God suck his dick?
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
I used his computer to order the pizza and the only thing he had in his search bar was 'text NASA'
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
We were at dinner and dad asked me to pass the salt and I suddenly remembered doing body shots when I was blacked out last weekend.
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
I threw up in the middle of a bar last night and still managed to get laid! Happy thanksgiving!
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
I woke up under a house in Key West
Randomize
