I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
Dear male population: sorry for being such a dick tease but thanks for paying for my bar tab and drunk food
this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
Any day that starts with a call from my ex-bf... crying... is a good day.
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
I'm drunk and kinda wanna go home but now I have to go have more sex, my boxers are in the dryer
Randomize
