i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
Last night drunk me texted a sure to be hungover me my class schedule and locations for today. I'm like a mom preparing her child for the first day of school
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
On a scale of 1 to 3, with 1 being the smallest and 3 being the largest, what size nipple pasty do you think I am?
James this is colleen. This is my new number. You just texted my grandma about getting cockblocked. Congratulations.
Figured out why that fly won't leave. It keeps buzzing through my weed smoke
Fly high, Fly.
Taylor Swift needs more songs about threesomes. I'm not sure she gets me anymore.
Stop calling me, Mom. I'm in his closet. You're gonna blow my cover and I'm about to catch this lying SOB.
I fucked her with a giant balloon tied to my dick. You tell ME how my night went
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
I don't know who's idea it was to get wine for a frat party but my poor pitiful hung over self really fucking hates them.
Randomize
