So I fucked an Aussie broad with huge feeders last nite 2x... Before banging her she was blowin me & I thought: "SHE IS GOIN DOWN-UNDER ON ME". Laughed out loud
You gave me the wrong number last night so I texted someone else something I definitely shouldn't have.
When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
I look better un-naked...
when i was 16 reading the aftercare instructions at the piercing place i wondered why they would ever think to warn me about getting semen in my bellybutton
then i met college
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
I'm in my boyfriends bathroom and I shit so bad, there was no toilet paper but his mom's clothes were on the floor and I wiped my butt on her underwear... now it looks like she sharted
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
Whatever, she only has 293 friends, she cant afford to be defriending me..
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
I hear sloppy seconds go great with fried rice
he just looked at me, said "i think i'll keep you around, you put the seat back up and everything," and then burst into tears.
I should be free tonight unless my 5 speed vibrator arrives in the mail today, than we might have scheduling conflicts.
I thought this boy told me to choke him, so I went all in. Turns out he really said “stroke.”
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