I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
Do you think Conan would leave his wife for me?
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
definitely just fell out of bed trying to plug in my phone. when did laziness start getting painful?
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
Woke up and there was a kayak in the pool. Are you alive?
She trust falled out of a window. It was like that scene from A Little Princess but with a lot more blood.
GO AHEAD, BITCH, GLARE AT MY WAFFLE ONE MORE TIME. I WILL FUCK YOU UP.
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
I don't know how Dave is alive, I feel like he's been drinking since I met him.
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
Don't judge me 👊🏼 his dick just whispers my name
I fucked a 6 foot tall guy who has abs showing without even flexing... I am a wizard and I have magical powers.
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