I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
he just sent me a friend request on facebook. i wish it were physically possible to vomit on him through the internet.
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
I mean I gotta puke to be skinny, wax to be hairless, and drink to be fun. Life isn't easy.
I was literally just a half conscious dildo.
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
The man who lives downstairs is fluent in Russian, and also a playboy. You should meet.
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
Randomize
