so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
The best part of listening to lady gaga while high is that any word your brain puts in is right.
don't blame me for your drunken lack of judgement
big words... still drunk. dont care. your fault.
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
You realize at the bar last night we blew on imaginary whistles like rose from titanic right?
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
Just got back from the tanning beds. I'm a lobster. I fear for the safety of my nipples falling off.
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
did you just say you're too stoned to fool around? okay we're over.
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
You told me you didn't want to go to the hospital because you were drunk, but because you didn't want to leave the "fun".
Randomize
